Bossa nova.

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We meant to see more of Malaysia, but having spent more time diving we had to race through it with only a couple of stops.

The monster journey south out of Thailand involved first a night boat (70 beds, one door and no lifejackets), then the back of a pick up (at 4am), and then a couple of minivans across the border. A gruelling 20 hours in total. I imagine this is what it feels like to be kidnapped.

Malaysia felt like a cleaner, calmer and more organised version of the rest of SE Asia - and with brutal '50s architecture added in. First off was Georgetown on the island of Penang. Couple of nights here but it rained heavily so we didn't see much. Found an amazing chinese restaurant stuffed full of locals where we demolished a plate of barbeque chicked with plum sauce. So good we went back the next night and ate the exact same thing.

Next we sped down to Melaka, a town on the east coast famous for its antique and curio shops (the sort usually found in brighton). Had a couple of nights here, where I further expanded my 80s digital watch collection. It hammered it down quite a lot again - we considered a beer at 10.30am during one downpour, which is early even for Paula.

One night we managed to find a bar with a bit of atmosphere for the England Slovenia game: Big screen, chairs laid out, english commentary. Brilliant. There wsa a woman singing on stage, accompanied by a man on a tiny keyboard, but they stopped just as the national anthems came on, so all was looking good.

However, the keyboardist then presses the 'demo' button, ups the volume and sits down to watch the game. I politely ask if we can have the sound on for the football -to be told that it was live music night and that the band were playing, at which point she pointed across at the keyboardist who had his feet on the table. So there's about twenty people watching the big screen (including keyboardist), with no commentary and just a bossa nova beat. It turned out that this actually improved the game.

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