Snakes, Weddings and Time is running out!

wonderful change in the weather. after a week of hot, rainy, humid weather with dull gray skies, Saturday dawned with a blue, blue sky and much cooler temperatures. During the day were are still talking hot, but hot that is bearable, actually, more than bearable, it is actually pleasant. Early mornings and evening are cool-I have not had my fan on for three days now, and actually had a blanket on my bed last night. I wore my hair down today-for the first time ever.

I have three things to tell you:

1. I thought I had seen everything in the morning market-while I go to purchase my onions, tomatoes, potatoes, carrots, cucumbers, cauliflower (yes, sometimes even cauliflower) I have become used to large toads, all manner of meat bits and parts-unfridgerated, of course-, fish, both live and dead, birds-and I’m not just talking about chickens-crows, teeny little birds, etc. are common (I have never seen a bird here in a tree, nor have I ever heard one..poor things don’t last long), squirrels, rats, little flattened toads (or perhaps frogs) on a stick, bats (yup, they eat bats), all manner of bugs and larvae, together with fermented fish paste. This morning, they had snake-I don’t mean little snakes, I am HUGE snake steaks. I just stopped and stared. The mere thought of how large the thing had once been filled me with total dread and terror. As many of you will know, I have a total and complete, irrational fear of those creatures....these steaks were at least a foot thick and as big as a dinner plate...okay..that’s all I can write. I just whimpered quietly, and walked on home.

2. I was invited to a Lao wedding party Saturday night. The sister of one of the BBM staff was married in the afternoon, and some of the BBM staff were invited to attend the evening party. Pho, the older guy (26) doesn’t have a girlfriend, so he told me that since he did not have a girlfriend or a date, he would take me. He meant it in the nicest possible way, it just came out funny. There was a BBM dinner for some visitors before hand, so we left from the dinner and went to the party. In Lao, private cars are almost unheard of. I think I have seen three or four in my whole time here. The poor walk, the not so poor have a push-bike, and those of means have motor bikes. The markets have motor bike parking lots, with attendants. ANYWAY, in Lao, women sit side saddle if they are wearing a skirt,for reasons that are obvious. All my previous adventures had me on a motor bike while wearing trousers, so this was a first for me. There were four bikes, and eight of us heading to the party. All the Lao though it was hilarious that I was riding sidesaddle and not falling off. We rode for about ten minutes, then pulled into this large, flat area, which was the parking lot-there were, I kid you not, at least 300 motor bikes, and there was a traffic jam getting into the parking area, and jockeying for good parking spots...no parking meters, though.

Then, we walked through this arch covered with netting and flowers-roses, gardenias, and other things that I don’t know what they were. and into a big open area. At one end, there was a covering over the musicians and the loud speakers (and there were many, many-speakers, not musicians). Just after the arch, there were two big silk covered containers, with beads and netting all over them-for the cash, of course. Here, what you do, is you put your cash into the envelope your invitation came in-that way, they know who gave them what, and the person attending the party doesn’t have to buy a card-clever, eh? No gifts, everyone gives cash.

There were a HUGE number of people-probably somewhere between 350 and 400, I would guess. 401, with the one falang. Each table had food-about five or six different dishes. NO idea how long they had been sitting on the table, but all the BBM staff dug right in..rice, of course was also on hand, in vast quantities. I look at Pho and said that we had just eaten a big dinner, and he said yes, but when it comes to food, Lao are pigs. There was also beer Lao. Earlier in the day, Pho had told me Lao people like to drink, and once they start are not known for their moderation. I just sort of nodded, and wondered why he had told me that. Well, I found out. While my drinking capacity and frequency has diminished over the years, I have been known to imbibe a beer, or two, and I have been around some pretty expert imbibers. Let me tell you, these folks pack it in, at a frenetic pace, with out pause. The only thing that saves them from totally falling over is, I think, the ice-as the beer is warm, so they add ice to each glass. As the evening progressed, the clinking under the table got louder and louder. Empty bottles are stored under the table-not sure if this is to disguise the volume consumed at the table, or if this is just the usual storage depot, or both. Anyway, I was in awe of their capacity and endurance. I asked if there were any laws in Laos regarding drinking and driving and the answer was no. So, while I did not fear for their imprisonment, I did fear they would wrap themselves around a pole on the way home. My driver, being a responsible chap, imbibed only a moderate amount.

They had both a singer who sang to recorded tracks, and other music that was just recorded. We were there for the first dance, which is the same in Lao as in Canada-the bride and groom dance around, and everybody watches them and says “aw”. This was the only “western” dance-the bride and groom smiled, and did a slow dance type of thing- the photographer went nuts and the video guy caught every move. Then, the real dancing started. And, the women are on the outside of the circle and the men on the inside, and they parade around in a circle, shuffling their feet and doing those hand movements that a westerner can probably never learn. They do not touch-not at the beginning, not in the middle and not at the end. Couples sit together, but do not touch-they do not hold hands, they do not put their arms around each other, and they for sure do not kiss. I asked Pho about this, and he said, it was always like this, and public displays were just unheard of, and never, ever took place. Having seen this, it makes me even more aware of just how horrified/awkward they must feel when western couples behave in ways that would be considered pushing the limits at home.

Oddly, premarital sex is not off limits. In some of the hill tribes, the villages have small “love huts” to house young folks from the village and their guests-who are usually from a neighbourhing village. Many young couples live together, without marrying, with the support and blessing of their parents.

I guess they must get home and just rip their clothes off, in a real hurry.

The BBM staff person whose sister was the bride asked me to dance, and since he was the host, I could not refuse. I’m not good at the Lao dancing hand stuff. I said to Pho that all the women, young and old, had such beautiful hand movements.. He said they learnt in school, and I said you mean the older women, and he said no, dancing was still on the school curriculum. So, the communists teach traditional dancing...go figure.

We left at about 11:30, and most of the BBM staff left with us. Khamla, who is the most senior Laos at BBM, was very worried about my safety. I think he was worried about the falang getting mashed on the road. He is usually a very serious fellow, very focused and proper. He was up on the dance floor, going nuts.

Oh yeah! I almost forgot-later on in the evening, the dancing changed from the circles, arm movement thing to...are you ready????? line dancing, I kid you not. Line dancing....no touching, you know, and fancy foot work. It looked kinda like some of the dances they try to teach you in the Caribbean.

A very interesting night, indeed.

One last piece of info: the groom wore a suit, the bride wore a purple silk sinh (Lao wrap skirt), with a gold top and a purple band around the top. She had her hair on top of her head in a pyramid type thing, with a gold clip of some sort holding the whole thing up. No photos-I thought about taking my camera,but decided it would be tacky. There were four little girls who were, I think, the equivalent of flower girls. Three had on fancy pink western dresses, and the fourth had a replica of the brides costume.

3. I know I still have time here, but I’m definitely way past the half way mark, and feel there is so much more I wanted to do/experience. Not sure what those things are-becoming fluent in Lao is one, for sure. Traveling to the caves the rebels hid in during the war is another, and I don’t know what else. In terms of what I have accomplished, I feel like I just got here! Aren’t people funny?

Someone came into BBM today and asked me if I was the one who had been here volunteering almost two months, and I said not, and then I thought, yeah, they are probably talking about me...

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