Laos

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Wednesday 1st June

Went to Siem Reap airport and flew to Luang Prabang. Went to Spicy Backpackers hostel and settled into a 16 person dorm. Not recommended.
We went for a walk through town and spent time at the night market giggling at the little "love" badges that say "leave me you die" or "love all my breath."

Thursday 2nd June

After a horrendous nights sleep we up'd and left and checked into another hostel in our own room with AC and a hot shower for less than would we'd paid for a 16 dorm room. Evidently should have shopped around!

We then went to the local waterfall with Alice and Cheryl, some lovely girls from the UK who had both been teaching in Cambodia. The three of them got in and chatted away whilst I stood on the edge...it was far too cold to get in, no matter how tempting the monkey swing looked.
I went for a walk and saw some rescued black bears being fed, they were so cute!! Went back to the girls and convinced them to move on to the next part of the fall and then we all got in and let the fish nip at the dead skin on our feet. An odd feeling, glad I didn't opt for the fish pedicure for £20 at home!

Went to the night food market with the girls and then moved onto have a few drinks. Michelle and I didn't actually order any drinks as they had the BOGOF offer on cocktails and just before we were about to move on, out came a round of cocktails. Then another round. Then another. All in all we had 12 free drinks. The owner said it was their first week of opening and clearly we were making the place look busy which bought more customers in. An Israeli group joined us; they had all just finished their national service and the girls showed us photos of them in action. One explained that she initially refused to go as she did not want to go to the post she had been allocated. They requested her and she refused 6 times and then she was put in jail for a week. Then, she said, was able to discuss different placements. I think she got the placement she wanted. Two years national service for girls and three for men. If there has to be national service it needs to be the same length!

Friday 3rd June

We made a pit stop at an elephant sanctuary, it was gorgeous like a little homely resort for elephants. A guide told us that they are bought to the sanctuary and cared for with the money that comes from allowing tourists to wash the elephants in the river.
My guide then told me once we'd finished the trek that the elephants are actually hired out from the local owner for the entire year. Not impressed as it appeared to be a legitimate cause!

We then began our trek through the Laos jungle. It was just us 3 and the jungle. He pointed out some steps that has been added onto the branch of a tree in order to easily climb to retrieve the honey and Michelle asked "what the bears did?" I seriously don't know where her brain was but the guide looked at her with utter amusement. McHaggis strikes again!

We carried on trekking until we took a rest at first the Khamu village and then the Hmong tribe village was our pit stop for lunch. Didn't really enjoy the lunch as there were some very hungry children surrounding us, so we could buy their souvenirs and we didn't have enough food to share with all of them. We did buy lots of bracelets though, the guide said the money would allow the family to buy some veg from other villages.
Back at the bottom our boat wasn't available so we hitched a ride with a lady collecting bananas for the elephants. A great day out walking through the jungle.

Got on a VIP bus to Vangvieng and was woken by Michelle laughing her head off as one of the local women got off the bus and squatted in full beam of the bus' headlights. All these men were doing their business around her as well....think she thought because she couldn't see us we couldn't see her.

Saturday 4th June

So after having my arm marked number 188 with permanent pen and grabbing my tube we headed down to the river. Clearly the number is to identify you if you happen to kill yourself on one of the death slides.
Our first stop is a riverside bar where everyone is decorating themselves with car paint. It clearly hadn't come off some people for days. Girls decorated themselves with hearts and stars and boys sketched the obligatory penis drawing on each other. That I will never understand...you all have one so why the need to draw it on each other?
Getting merry we chatted to some randoms and before I knew it this girl was telling me how much she missed her car. Her car! She had been travelling for all of one month and it happened to be her 21st birthday. What makes someone miss their car? I did suggest perhaps travelling wasn't for her and it might be time to go home...she agreed and then threw up.
We climbed into our tubes and then splashed into the freezing muddy river and got hooked into the next bar. Took a look at the menu and then clocked as to why everyone was being very weird. One guy said to me "I watched a guy break his neck on that slide last week" the fact that he'd been there a week did speak volumes and before I'd come back from the bar I watched him hurtle himself down the slide and crash into some rocks. He didn't die but was hurt. There is one death a week at Tubing in Laos so we decided to rest up and wait. The calibre of numpties at this particular bar were definitely helping skew the statistics in our favour of seeing someones drunken end. One girl even screamed "I'll get my boobs out, that will get everyone in." O.K LOVE.

It was fun but if anyone ever says they spent longer than a day or two at tubing I would definitely consider walking away. It isn't really a nice river, the drinks are horrific, the locals understandably hate the tourists and I wouldn't be surprised if it got shut down soon.

Once we'd handed back the tubes we went to a bar and enjoyed several drinks and many episodes of Friends! It was so surreal but brilliant! Friends when you are slightly drunk is even funnier!

PS. As of the middle of June, Laos Tubing was shut down.

Sunday 5th June

9 hour bus back to Luang Prabang and then 15 hours overnight to border town Hoixuay.

Monday 6th June

Sleep

Tuesday 7th June - Princess of the Jungle!!!!

Two hour drive from town to the edge of the jungle and then our 4x4 got stuck. Naturally I stood back and observed the efforts from our group. Poor Bas was covered in mud! After a couple more hairy moments where we could have tipped over the edge we made it to the village.
First 50metres, boots off and sashay through a river. Boots back on for a hours climb and then lunch. We put our harnesses on and walked the final 200metres to the first zip line.
Our guide Va Lao gave us a safety demonstration and then we were off. It was amazing!!! I was so scared at first I had my eyes focused forward for most of it but when I did look down at the jungle beneath me I felt so cool! I didn't make it all the way across so had to pull myself in monkey style.
Then we walked to the next one and still didn't make it to the otherwise and Va Lao had to come out and get me. We did 3 more zip lines before making it to our tree house. It was 150metres up and you could scan the whole jungle. We popped out to play a bit more before dinner and I felt like Jane of the jungle popping home for tea. Well not tea, hot chocolate! Hot chocolate in a tree house in Laos is absurdly brilliant especially when the hot water is transported via a kettle via a zip line! Ahhhhhh!!!

The zip wire off treehouse 5 is unbelievably scary, you have to literally throw yourself off the edge. It's ok when the guide is there telling you safety this safety that but after we'd arrived at the tree house we were left to our own devices. Very scary!

Wednesday 8th June

More zip wiring around the jungle. Absolutely no chance of seeing a Gibbon as we were far to noisy screaming across the jungle and had crazy Mags bellowing OOOOKKKKK!! Very funny! Mags is definitely queen of the jungle! I was extremely jealous of Bas' technique, he had it down, always reaching the other side! I did not. Bas and Mags definitely the craziest nicest couple we've met!!
We trekked to the waterfall and pretended it was warm for a much needed wash and then moved onto treehouse 6. The toilet view from this treehouse is indescribable!

Thursday 9th

June
Due to excessive rain one of the river crossings was over waist height and the current would have took us over, so our guide fixed a broken wire so that we could cross. Saved getting soaked!
We then had to trek for 4 hours back to the village. The guide was hacking a path for us so we could try not to fall over and avoid the dreaded leeches. I did feel like we were lost in Jurassic Park!
We rested up and waited for our vehicles. Except this time only one turned up and it was clear that they were going to ram 16 people in one 4x4. Well actually 3 on top, 2 hanging off the back and the rest squashed in the very smelly back. I climbed on top with Bas and Sally and we were all ducking and diving trying to avoid knocking ourselves out on trees. We looked like we'd been attacked by kittens.

A phenomenal experience with a crazy Dutch couple and a gorgeous Aussie. Definitely a highlight!

Jumped on a long-tail boat for 5 minutes to cross into Thailand. Surprising they let us in considering our stench!

Much love x x

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Photos

Before we even reached the experience...it was an experience
I did the right thing, stood back and took photographs