The Wa

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The "wa," or group harmony, is the feeling of collectivism which is fundamental to Japanese society. It means putting the needs of the group before your own, and acting according to your place to keep things running smoothly.

Since I've been here, I've seen what I consider the "wa" at work in various ways, and I'm sure much of it has gone over my head. But what's really hit me is the immediate inclination people have to share rather than just do for themselves.

Twice at lunchtime I've gone to a nearby bakery with one of my coworkers, and she must have noticed that I like chocolate chip muffins. Every time she goes there now she brings one back for me, and that little surprise has made my day every time.

Whenever someone goes on a trip, they bring back sweets or some sort of food for the office as "omiyage." That means that instead of starting a conversation about your trip to the beach with pictures of yourself there, you would start it with a gift to someone else.

Many of my relationships with Japanese people have been built in this way - on the basis of giving. I'm not saying I'm a pro at this whole facet of society, but I've been trying to follow the examples of others whenever I can. They're simple things, like offering to buy people drinks when I go to the vending machine, or giving a slice of my pear to someone else. But these simple actions lead to conversations, and eventually to friendships.

I can't help but wonder what would happen if some "wa" was introduced into Western society. What if when you went shopping your first thought wasn't "how hot will I look with this designer bag," but "that shirt would be perfect for my friend?" What if people considered the safety of society as a whole to be more important than their own right to own a gun?

Of course the "wa" isn't perfect - along with a low crime rate comes a rigid social structure and a reluctance to speak out (escpecially, I have found, in English class). The fear of being different from the other students keeps many kids quiet, even when I know they know the answer.

But even so, I think we individualistic Americans could learn a lot from a little dose of "wa."

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