a first

Two days ago I was with a man when he left his body. An Indian worker and I were washing him. He had been softy crying and going fetal, and was very squirmy while being soaped up. I kept telling him ekkane nirapad, ekkane khanna, aum shanti shanti aum (he was almost certainly a Hindu). While I was washing him, I was wondering if sick/senile/confused people in Prem Dan sometimes think that perhaps they have already crossed over. Depending on one's attitude, it is a place that could be interpreted as either a higher or a lower plane of existence. I was also curious as to where the man had received his many scars, where he was from, if he had siblings or children, why and when and where he had turned to the bottle to drown his memories and dreams. As his bath went on, he became a bit pathetic and fetal, so I sang "Born on the Bayou" and "Proud Mary". I saw him smile for the first time. Two minutes later, the Punjabi fella I was working with was shaving the man, and I noticed he was no longer breathing.

I am proud of him. He died well, like a man who had made peace with his fate.

I hope that I did my dharma correctly. Eshsharrer janni.



I woke this morning to rise with the sun
I laugh and cry to think what I've done
you hurt some people, just trying to have fun
from chakra karma no creature can run

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