Action Westie takes on the Himalyas... and Bhopal rickshaw drivers.

Yo chaps and chapesses. How goes? I hope you are all getting into the Christmas spirit at home, even though I know it just won't be the same for you without me there! Its been a mixed 9 days since last my voice reached out across the oceans to you, starting badly (with, I must admit, some wanting to go home) and ending much better, as I'm sure you'll be glad to hear.

So, when I was writing last I was sitting in Bhopal having fled Pachmarhi that morning. Sadly, the next available train to Agra wasn't until late the following evening, so on Monday (1st Dec) I had the joy of wondering round the city. This did not take long, for Bhopal is deservedly not a tourist attraction. Ok, I'm being *slightly* unfair, it was a Monday and lots of sights in India are closed on Mondays, and I did see a fairly impressive mosque (and got to witness my first call to prayer!), but otherwise the place was like Delhi only without the occasional pretty buildings. I struggled through the chaotic streets until past lunch (and let me note here that I hope every single one of Bhopal's autorickshaw drivers ends up in whatever hell their religion provides for them) then finally gave up and spent most of the afternoon in an internet cafe watching every BSG video ever posted to youtube. At about 6 I headed off for a sunset boat ride around the lake, which promised to redeem the city slightly in my eyes, only to get there and find that for some reason it wasn't running that evening. This was about strike 17 for Bhopal, and I boarded my train with little desire to ever come back to it.

I arrived in Agra at some ungodly hour of the morning, and immediately got into an alcatration with a hotel owner when he changed my large note for me (to pay the rickshaw driver) and then tried to get me to stay in his hotel. I always refuse to do that sort of thing, to avoid ending up in a place not of my choosing and paying commission for the driver on top of my bill. I stomped off a couple of blocks and started to look for the hotel I *wanted* to stay in only to be pointed back by various helpful people and to realise that the place I had been dropped *was* in fact the place I wanted to stay. Cue humiliated slinking back to the place from me and much abject grovelling to the hotel owner. Agra was off to a good start. Went up for breakfast on the rooftop cafe (which boasted views of the Taj) only to find it was bitterly cold and any sight of the Taj was obscured by huge banks of fog across the river. Gave up and went to bed for a couple of hours.

When the sun had risen a little I walked to Agra fort, which is similar to the Red Fort in Delhi but far more preserved. It was pretty impressive, and quite enjoyable, apart from this deaf mute (and possibly mentally retarded) guy who followed every step I took and did not understand my angry commands to back off. Agra Fort is where Mughal emperor Shah Jahan, who built the Taj as a tomb for his wife Mumtaz, was imprisoned by his son for 18(?) years after the latters uprising, and from his apartments was only able to see his famous creation downriver. Unfortunutely, this famous view too was obscured by the fog and smog that lay over the city (Agra is horribly polluted), although apparently you can see it sometimes. In the afternoon I wondered round the old city and the mosques as best I could. I've never heard a traveller speak a good word about the city of Agra itself, and it the main this seems mostly justified. It was certainly the only place so far where I have seen actual human excretment laying in the streets... well, that I know of...

I wanted to catch the Taj at sunset (seeing as I had missed it at sunrise) so after lunch I started traipsing around the city looking for a fiction bookstore. I've been really trying to pace myself on reading and buying books (they are pretty long train rides, y'know), but by this stage I had managed to read Bryson's 'A Walk in the Woods' three times straight in a week, and I was going a little crazy. Its a good book, but nothing can stand up to that sort of intense perusal. Plus, I had an all day 10-hour train journey the following day for Haridwar, and by god I wasn't going to read it for a 4th time. However, in a weird and frustrating circumstance which I still find irritating, Agra does not seem to have one bookshop that is not entirely limited to books with titles like: "The Complete Kama Sutra: Spice up YOUR sex life!!!" or "Yoga Your Way to Health and Happiness". Finally I had to enlist the services of one enterprising 13 year old cycle-rickshaw-ist, who eventually found me a fiction bookshop and took me back to the Taj.

By now the sun was setting, and I only had limited time left to see the Taj. This window of opportunity was reduced further by the security guards at the entrance, with whom I had a furious argument and who, let me state here, deserve even more fire and brimstone than the rickshaw drivers. [As an aside, if I come back from India with one thing, it will be the balls to argue with ignorant, power-mad and obnoxious waitresses/taxi-drivers/salesmen and all their ilk, which can only be a good thing.] In any case, I entered the Taj complex furious and expecting to be throughly disappointed and let down by the 'teardrop on the face of eternity'. Y'know what, though? The Taj Mahal is bloody beautiful. It is both monolithic and graceful, covered in the most delicate work, and what's more it seems to impart a weird sense of serenity, calm and even solitude - believe me, quite a remarkable feat considering the hoards of Indian tourists screaming at its feet. Its really quite nice. My feelings towards the city were later softened further when I discovered a restaurant which played Hollywood DVDs and served me beer surreptiously in a china mug, even if it is a little embarrassing to cry to 'Finding Neverland' in front of an entire room-full of strangers...

The next day (Wednesday 3rd for y'all at home), I headed off on my 10 hour train journey, which with the aid of a new book I actually quite enjoyed, arriving in Haridwar at 9pm and unable to do more than eat and hit the sack. Haridwar is one of the seven holy cities of India, located at the point where the Ganges emerges from the Himalaya, and its a centre of pilgrimage for thousands of Indian Hindus every year. Its also blimmin cold, especially when your hotel has no heating, no hot water and tiled floors underfoot. (Only the best hotels have heating, god knows why.) By now I was in Uttarakhand, in the mountainous north, and the part of India that I had most looked forward to. Thus far, Haridwar and Rishikesh seem to have lived up to my optimism. In the morning I wound my way through the narrow bazaars down towards the main ghat, where hundreds of people were bathing in the Ganges. I went in up to my knees and I can tell you that this river is COLD, not to mention fast-flowing (you have to hold onto chain so as not to be swept away). Nevertheless, these pilgrims were stripping to their underwear and fully plunging themselves in, for which they have my admiration. Great people-watching experience: its easy to get caught up in the spiritual clamour there, and it seemed almost as if all of swarming humanity was bathing, selling, praying and begging on these steps. Pretty cool. In the evening it got even better. Every night Haridwar hosts the famous aarti ceremony on the ghats, with hundreds of people chanting, banging gongs and drums and sending these little 6inch boats filled with flowers and other offerings and lit by a candle down the river, whilst the priests perform a ritual with foot high burning torches. I've always understood, or at least seen the sense, of the human compulsion to worship nature and the elements, in a primordial sort of way, and the whole thing was so cool I decided to stay another night in Haridwar so I could see it again.

The next day I went on safari in Ranjii National Park, home to elephants, bears, tigers and leopards amongst much else. I'd arranged this the day before with this guy called Sanjeev, who was recommended in the LP, and who turned out to be a total legend. As well as running safaris and treks through his company, he was a location scout for Bollywood films (and had done much of the locations for 'Heroes', the Kashmir based film I had seen in Jaipur), counted Bobby Deol, one of THE biggest Bollywood stars as a childhood friend, and spent most of the year on film shoots around the world. He also has the sharpest eyes I've ever met, knows a ridiculous amount about animals and birds, and is an amazing photographer. Apparently the number of Western tourists has suddenly dropped after the Mumbai attacks, so it was just me, him and our jeep driver alone in the national park for 5 hours. We didn't see any leopards or elephants (apart from his 8 year old adopted orphan elephant Yogi!) but we did see a remarkable amount of exotic birds as well as lots of deer, monkeys, wild boar and beautiful natural scenery.

The following morning I moved on again, taking the bus up to Rishikesh and arriving before lunchtime. Rishikesh is a big traveller destination, being both 'the yoga centre of the world' and an important adventure-sports centre. I wasn't so interested in the yoga, but after exploring the town (full of ashrams, temples and GREAT restaurants) I immediately booked a full-day white-water rafting trip for the next day (Sun 7th). So much fun! There were two rafts, my one with five of us in, and another with 8 that had been doing it for 2 days already. It was far easier than I expected, very like rowing, and although the (very sweet) Indian girl in front of me was actually the most *useless* person with a blade/paddle I've ever met, it was great fun. Highlight was 'Jumping Rock' where you could leap 15ft from a rock into the Ganges. Obviously I was first to jump (yes, I had a very sad need to prove my manhood!) Would love to do it again some time.

Thus far I've been kind of turned off by places with too many travellers, but in Rishikesh its actually kind of nice. I fell into conversation with one group and ended up going to dinner with them all, and then yesterday hiked up this huuuge mountain by the side of an endless waterfall, with two of the guys, Mathias and Kristof. Its the first place I've really stopped and just chilled out rather than moving on every couple of days, and I've really enjoyed it. Plus there is this amazing restaurant/cafe/bakery that overlooks the river and has the most amazing cakes (and apple crumble!!!) Clearly this genius 'lose ridiculous amounts of weight in India' plan just aint gonna happen.

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Part of trip: Backpacking around India and Nepal

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