It's been a while

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A long while since my last blog. Alot and a little has happened since then!!

First off we left the chilly heights of the mountains and made our way back to Delhi. We made a visit to the 'Zoo' to pass the time. Now being in India the 'Zoo' is not much more than a park with cages, these cages more often than not being empty, full of rats or unlabelled so that no-one has the foggiest what the animal inside is. We did get to see some Tigers and Lions and other awe-inspiring animals (even if their habitat had a lot to be desired for).

Onwards from here to Khajuraho. This quaint little town is home to some rather erotic sculptures, namely the 'Karma Sutra' temples. Very imaginative I give them that!! We spent a few days here visited a few times by a mouse, who probably lived in our room loooong before we did. After seeing the main temples there is not a great deal to do except see more (less splendid) temples. So we hired bikes and went to see the 'less good' ones.

Our next plan was to visit a National Park, see some tigers, ride and elephant, spy on rare wildlife. Great! So we prebook our accommodation with the tourist trust and made our route to get there. A highly stupid route. Instead of getting the train for one hour we decided to get the bus for five and waste time like this rather than waiting at the train station. The bus we were meant to get didn't show. After another hour the next came. And it was relatively empty. Result! That was untill we got to the next town when about 100 people crammed on making the bus about 4 times over capacity. Ciaran was used as a table for people's fruit and veg (as he couldn't fit his knees into the actual seat). We finally got to the train station (nearing 11pm) to find our train delayed for 4 hours. And it was cold, there were cows all over the gaff and morale was low!! Finally our train pulled into the station. Or so we thought. Several people assured us this was our train!!

Finally we get some sleep, only to be awoken 3 hours later in Allahabad. Not a national park. So some 6 hours to wait for a 8 hour train or something of the like we jacked in the idea of the National Park and made for Varanasi. And it turned out to be a bloody good thing to!

Varanasi. Not much more than a dirty river we found out on our first day. I say this but I am sure that in better circumstances I would have felt different. We spent the day walking up the ghats and seeing the different sights to behold. Including the very interesting/disturbing/amazing cremations. The auspicious ceremonies take place continuously throughout the day. We paused to watch a complete one. Turns out that there can be an element of humor as the son (possibly) of the deceased lit one final cigarette and placed it in the mouth and then dowsed him with whiskey. Nice.

Our second day in Varanasi took a turn for the worse. As some of you are aware my stomach did not take well to India. Not at all. No other way to put it really but I had the shits. Again. After 6 weeks of my stomach doing on/off gymnastics a trip to the hospital was needed.

To the horror of the consulting doctor I should never had let it persist for so long and was admitted for tests and such straight away. I was given the 'VIP' bed in A&E (which was a curtain to hide me from the other patients who no matter how ill they were loved a good stare!) The nursed tried to get an drip in me however my veins had other ideas. Mum you'll be glad to know that I could never be an intravenous drug user it would just be too much effort! After one of my quick toilet dashes I cam back to find that the VIP area had been taken over by a billion nurses trying to revive the woman (who I am sure was dead, bless her) on the bed next to me. Great start!!

I was then transferred to the ward, accompanied by my new husband according to the hospital records ?!?! Poor Ciaran. The delightful room I stayed in was complete with window, flat screen tv and numerous blood stains on the wall. The best part about it was that it hadn't been cleaned from the previous occupant, blood in the bin, piss in the pan and sick in the sink. However the toilet was unscathed. Joy!

And so began my week long stay in hospital. I was originally supposed to be in for two but that was soon prolonged. Ciaran moved in, made friends with the troop of monkeys that lived out side the window of my room, he even went out to feed them pizza that I couldn't eat.

The nurses were very nice and helpful, the doctor was hard track down to find out what was going on. I was being given about ten different medicines and not a clue why. Luckily when my mum rang I asked her to google what they were for so we had some kind of idea it was more than a dicky tummy. The nurses were extremely noisy. At any given time of the night or early morning two could walk in and start a conversation, share a joke and once launch into a full blown argument. And they couldn't understand why I slept until 10 (fuckers kept me (and Ciaran) up most of the night)

The thing that got me through the ordeal was BBC entertainment (Rick Steins Mediterranean Odyssey) and AXN (Total Wipeout and Minute to Win it). But the thing that nearly finished me off was the food. The plain, cold rice that I had to eat and the soggy toast. On that alone I could have flown back for my Christmas dinner! Thanks to everyone who called and texted to keep me sane. And to Ciaran for putting up with me/the food/the bad tv.

After a zillion antibiotics I was released (with a billion more). 22nd of December, just in time for Christmas! For those of you who want to google it I had amoebic dysentery caused by E Coli and Entamoeba Histolytica. Niiice!

But I am all good now. Morale of the story, go the doctors earlier! And stop moaning about the NHS. Seriously we take that shit for granted!

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