New Perspectives

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It's now 9 months since I moved to China and I have to admit to finding it difficult sometimes. However, our recent travels have given me a new, more positive perspective. I think it's partly because I was able to compare Tonglu to bigger cities, and partly because I could see Shum struggling to cope with some aspects that I used to find difficult but now just accept.

There is a lack of consideration towards others here, in my mind. However, I now realise that this is more about looking after yourself and your family rather than actively trying to thwart other people. This probably comes from a tumultous - and very recent - history where people did have to fight tooth and nail to ensure their families survival. History has taught people to be wary, and not to take a comfortable life for granted. I do still have frustrations - people riding their motorbikes on the pavement and expecting you to get out the way, smoking everywhere, people spitting in the street, for example - but it is much easier for me to live in Tonglu knowing that this behaviour exists everywhere we visited in China, even the supposedly cosmopolitan Shanghai and Beijing. I think, before, I used to complain about the attitudes of Tonglu people, believing that it was because they were in the countryside, their views were some how not as 'advanced'. Now, having been to the cities, I realise that Tonglu people are fairly typical of Chinese people,and that they are just different to me. I'm really lucky to live here actually because there are benefits to living in a small place that would be lost in a big city.

Chinese people are very, very different to us in some important ways. Of course, we are similar in lots of ways too, but the differences in beliefs, aspirations, values and standards of acceptability do leave a massive gulf. I am living in THEIR country and, nine months in, have decided that I'd better get used to it! Comparing them to the UK isn't helpful or fair, and suggests the UK is better, which, in some things, it isn't. My friend Kully gave me some great advice once, saying that you can't change other people, only the way they make you feel or behave, and I've decided to adapt this to my life here - I can't change China, but can adjust my attitude. In fact, when I was away, I decided that after my MBA I would consider coming back to China to work again and am going to keep up my Chinese lessons next year when I am home to give me more options on graduating. At the moment, I'd rather stay in Glasgow when I finish, and live happily ever after, but I've gone from thinking I would NEVER come back here to actually seeing it as a favourable option!

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