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Published: December 5th 2013
CAMBODIA...Men ask women to marry...and are the ones who risk rejection. I saw a pair of birds in a tree...rubbing beaks...sort of dancing around each other.
Saw another pair of birds...one looking keener than the other...one chasing...the other coy.
Couldn't help but think "Why doesn't he just ask her?'...but not speaking bird talk...maybe he had...or maybe he's not a he but a she.
Saw another pair of birds...decidedly frisky...mating...starting a family.
I hear they mate for life...bit like marriage...but who asks who?
Then I got to thinking.
How did it come about that in most human cultures...men ask women to marry???
*****
In ancient Cambodia there was a queen named Srei Ayuthyea.
Beautiful she was...no doubt about it...but no-one asked for her hand in marriage...intimidated by her Royal blood t'was said...no-one dared.
The other women in the Kingdom did not have this difficulty...just her.
Worried that she may never have an heir...she decided to choose who her husband be...and let it be known she did so.
Inspired by their Queen's example...the women in the Kingdom took to wooing the men.
But they soon discovered a
downside.
Men started rejecting the advances of some women...instead of risking rejection...they chose when to do the rejecting.
The men never said "No" to the most charming of the Khmer women...but...those not as good looking...well...they found it hard to attract a husband.
So the not as good looking devised a plan...convinced their better looking sisters to defy the men in a bet.
The bet required men in one team...women in the other.
They would have one night to build a hill...the biggest when the first morning star appeared would be the winner.
The men will win this...the good looking women said...no chance we can win that.
OK...the others said.
If the women win...we will return to our old ways...and the men will woo the women. No chance of that happening...no chance.
We will tell the men this is a battle of the sexes...and NOT tell them of our wager.
*****
Convinced of their superiority the men agreed.
The men & the women then started building.
*****
In the middle of the night the women lit a lantern...and raised it...on bamboo poles...high
in the night sky.
Thinking they were seeing the morning star...the men laid down their tools with satisfied grins...and decided to have a well earned rest.
The women on the other hand...kept on working...kept on building their hill.
*****
The roosters crowed...greeting the stretches of pink light at dawn...greeting the morning star climbing the sky.
The men then woke up.
Saw the real morning star.
Saw the women's hill was higher than their's.
Saw the grins drain from their faces.
Expected humiliation.
Understood the women's treachery.
*****
Since that day in the Kingdom of Cambodia...men ask women to marry...and are the ones who risk rejection. *****
As I paddled in the inland sea of Tongle Sap...floated among the trees in the Flooded Forest...among the stilted villages of the Mekong flood basin...danced among the stones and consuming tree roots of the ruined jungle temples of Beng Mealea...that the Khmer Rouge had land-mined in reckless disregard...shimmied with the warriors in the stone frescoes of Angkor Wat...completed my spiritual journey that had began in Borobudur in Java...and reflected on this magical land...this Kingdom
of Cambodia.
And it was good.
Relax & Enjoy,
Completing part 5 of our Cambodian adventures,
Dancing Dave
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taracloud
Tara Cloud
Borabador to Angor Wat!
What a fantastic journey through eons of time, temples and beautiful faces! Great photos of places of wonder--flooded forests and sad, beautiful Beng Mealea with its tumble-down temples and landmines. And as usual, you are the King of the Panoramas. Ciao Cambodia!