Name Dropping in Kenya

If you read any newspaper, travel warning, or guide book about Kenya you will find out very quickly that your chances of being robbed, extorted, caught in a political conflict or between warring gangs are very high. We found out everything we needed to know about Kenya from Andrew O.
We had the pleasure of meeting Andrew on our flight to Nairobi. He plays for the Kenya National Football team and grew up in the city. We don’t have a picture but he had his cornrows weaved with the Kenya National Flag colors and was wearing a white “camo” jumpsuit, plenty of bling, and a big Texas belt buckle….,Basically a cross between Snoop Dogg, 50 cent and amazingly Kenny Rogers (who is his favorite singer).
Andrew is not a shy man and is more than willing to explain how the world works to anyone who will listen. After about 20 minutes into the flight we figured out why….it was the alcohol talking. Not sure how many he had before he boarded but when the flight attendant asked him what he wanted to drink his response was “four Heinekens please”.
She gave him two. The next flight attendant asked him if she could get him anything and he said “four wines please.” She gave him two. Finally he was cut off. This is when he asked Jason to get his bag from the overhead. Surprisingly, there was a duty-free bottle of Amarula, the African equivalent of Baileys. Let’s just say he may have had a few sips off the bottle.
Andrew was actually very informative, one of his favorite topics was world politics. The current Kenyan president is a not a soccer fan, he is a golfer. So the Kenyan National team does not receive much funding. Example, their uniforms are whatever shirt and shorts they have from home but there is a big, beautiful, golf course in the middle of Nairobi.
A popular Kenyan pastime is to enter the US Visa lottery. Unemployment is very high in Kenya and everyone wants the chance to improve their situation. They feel very strongly that their chance is in the US, not Kenya. Andrew hopes Barack Obama is the next US president (Obama is from the same tribe as Andrew) because maybe he will open up the US to any Kenyan who wants to immigrate.
Next, he informed us we are called mzungus (Kiswahili for white people). He said Kenyans believe mzungus have a lot of money. Therefore, if Andrew is hanging out with mzungus then Andrew has a lot of money and he should be sharing it with everyone. He informed us he would not be taking us on a walking tour of Nairobi.
Andrew’s family is from the Lake so his father is a fisherman. Instead of a city tour he invited us to their home for a traditional tilapia dinner - with one condition. Jason would go out with Andrew and his five brothers while Woodley would stay at the house with Andrew’s 4 sisters to clean, cook and eat fish. We graciously declined his offer.
Andrew told us that his fame in Kenya sometimes causes him problems. We were suspicious about his claim and decided to test it out. The second we said his name it turned anyone from selling us something to talking about soccer around the world. If you are ever in Kenya our advice is just say you know Andrew O.

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