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On the 20
th April my great friends Lilli and Kebba got married. It seems ages ago now but I’ve been home for a holiday since then so I’m just catching up. It was a proper Gambian affair which was worlds away from the weddings we have back at home.
The day started very relaxed with our favourite breakfast of nebe (beans in bread with onions) with both of them round at their house. There’s none of this bad luck for seeing each other before the ceremony. Lilli and I then went back to my flat to get all dolled up. Lilli had two outfits; one which Kebba’s sister had given to her for the day time and one that she’d had specially made for the evening. Hair and makeup done and outfits squeezed into we went for more food at the local restaurant where we met back up with Kebba and his brother. Lilli and I were feeling very conspicuous sitting in our finery but people get dressed up every day here, taking huge pride in their appearance, especially on a Fridays, so I think we slotted right in, probably sticking out less than we usually do.
The ceremony
Can you spot Lilli? Her heads poking around from behind the pillar, a very significant role in the proceedings!After lunch Lamin turned up to take us all to Gunjur, Kebba’s home village which is about a half hours drive from Kololi. Wedding ceremonies are normally done at the mosque during five o’clock prayers. The father’s of the man and women would go to the mosque, the man would stay outside and the women would stay well out of the way back home in the compound; a concept that it a little difficult to imagine for a wedding but here it seems to be about joining two families together. It’s all very matter of fact and no nonsense. We were a little worried we were going to be a bit late. As it happens we were one of the first people at Kebba’s compound. Kebba’s Dad was so late the five o’clock prayers came and went. All was not lost however; they decided to bring the mosque to the compound instead which was great because Lilli and I got to see what was going on.
All the elders gathered round some mats laid out on the floor. Kebba’s Dad sat in the middle, as would Lilli’s Dad I think, but unfortunately he couldn’t be
there. There were lots of blessings done in Arabic and then the all important exchanging of the cola nuts. Cola nuts are enjoyed by many men here. They are, in my opinion the most disgusting thing I’ve ever tasted, but apparently they have toxins in them similar to tobacco so they become addictive. You get used to the taste so they tell me. Exchanging them at wedding ceremonies is a mark of respect and shows that the two families agree to come together. As well as the cola nuts, cans of Fanta were also given out; very significant apparently, cans of pop are quite a treat so I suppose it’s the same as us dishing out the champagne at a wedding.
We spent the rest of the day at the compound, eating food and meeting all of Kebba’s family. Kebba’s family is HUGE! His Dad has three wives and 18 children! No wonder he has a kingly look about him. He’s the head of his own little empire!
It was a great day and I felt very lucky to get to see it all and be a part of it particularly seeing the blessings
Kebba and his Dad
He looks such a dude! that would usually be only seen by the men. Kebba and Lilli were really happy with the day and I’m sure their happiness will continue for years to come. Congratulations Lilli and Kebba!!! Woohoo!!!!
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Mary
non-member comment
Sarah you look beautiful xx